7th World Egg Throwing Championships: Team updates
7th World Egg Throwing Championships: Team updates
• Russia and Hong Kong now confirm
attendance.
• Other confirmed teams, so far,
flying in from Germany, Holland, Greece, South Africa, USA,
Ireland, Sweden and New Zealand.
• England,
unusually, not confident.
HONG KONG
Led by
philosophy expert, Eva On Ying Wu, the team are expected to
use the Wu Wei method of egg identification. This is said to
be the most ancient of all the egg sports originating from
in the Shang Dynasty in Yinxu, circa 1200 BC.
IRELAND
A
Current World Champion at Russian Egg Roulette,
Derryman, Paul Murphy intends to attempt to retain his title
and has been practising hard much to the disgust of his long
suffering wife and children but to the delight of his dog.
Pauls wizarding skills appear to have been lost. He blames
over work and has taken a short converlesence break, without
his wife and children, in the Bahamas to prepare. They are
still not happy.
IRELAND B
Wild Willie
O’Donovan, current Irish National Egg Throwing Champion,
previous World Record holder and past All Ireland Road
Bowling Champ intends to beat all comers with his famous
tossing method which has to be seen to be believed. Some say
that his strange sideways wind up action can only be the
work of the dark arts whilst others claim his unnatural gait
is due to a third arm joint. Whatever the secret, his
ability to throw well over 100m will strike fear into all
participants, particularly his unfortunate
catcher.
UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
This team of
Texan wild cats have been hard at training at their Witchata
base for many moons, determined to teach the Brits a lesson
in “Egg Toss” and Russian Egg Roulette. With a team
motto of “We knows our eggs” these Southern Belles are
supremely confident that they will better the trebuchet
attempts of the last American team to enter that, having
over egged their machine, only managed to hurl eggs
backwards into, what had been unil that moment, friendly
crowds.
RUSSIA
It is said that Dmitry has
trained since the age of 3 in a special school for talented
atheletes. He is probably the best they have and this, well
honed, beefcake of a contender is sure to be a favourite
amongst the ladies and so confident of winning that he is
bringing with him his own TV crew to film the triumphant
crushing of all others.
That certainly sounds a good plan and we hope it goes well for him. Just to ensure even handed coverage though the organsiers explain that they also have Dutch, German and Reuters TV cameras there as well.
Germany
A Technological marvel, genius
Car maker, a sporting mecca, a Giant in the World of
Sausages and Pork Knuckles, and true maestro in the art of
brewing beer, but there is a sense of sadness. Perhaps even
despair amongst her population. Trailing the all-time
Olympic World Leader, the USA, by close to 1500 medals,
suffering a disappointing Second Place in the Euro 2008,
Third Place in the 2010 World Cup; Germany needs a dose of
pride, a shot of respect and a reason to once again believe
in themselves; this summer, that’s eggs-actly what they
hope to achieve...
With flying shells of calcium and yolk, German Representatives Björn Heibeult and Timo Breunig are striding forth onto the World Stage for the egg-ceptionally unique glory found only in the World Championship Egg Throwing Competition. Incensed by their bitter rivals The Netherlands maintaining a firm grasp on the title, the boys have been hard at work, lobbing eggs great distances through the air, wearing their splattered remains with pride as they hone their skills in an effort to match the Worlds Best.
Holland
The current World Champions and
World Record Holders have changed their team in order to
improve their chances of retaining the title. The two top
tossers Smink and Vissar are supported by a group of
managers, trainers, physiotherapists and ergonomics
specialists as they take on the Words best. Having won the
title last year and sealed it further with wins in Ireland
and Holland since then, they seek to improve on their World
Record of 63.3m. Can it be done? Additionally, having said
that the Germans “throw like a woman” they intend to
prove the point and are bringing their own Dutch National
pair of Female Egg Throwing Champs to thrash all
comers.
Greece.
Leaving behind the uncertainty
of home they come seeking fame and hopefully fortune. The
identical twin brothers, Kiris and Kostas Poulous, known as
“Double Trouble” have assured us that they will crush
all opposition from the Dutch and German teams saying
“They have their ways of doing things, we have our
own….. and ours is better”. Relatively late entries into
this sport but they say history is on their side “We
invented sport egg throwing, against the Persians in 480 BC
at Thermopylae and we certainly left them with egg on their
face.”
South Africa..
For the first time we
have an African contestant and one who has high hopes of
taking the Russian Egg Roulette title. Leo Houwing of Cape
Town, flies in on the 22nd, leaving behind the cool South
African winter and exchanging it for the scorching heat of
England. An accomplished fencer (with swords, not erecter)
and field hockey player of note his trainer and mother says
“He’s got the right stuff and will bring pride to all of
South Africa”
England
Whilst there is extreme
disappointment that local hero Jake Wilkinson will be out
due to a fractured ankle caused during training, there is
some hope that John Ward, famed inventor of the
“ward-a-matic automatic bra warmer” will keep the egg
trebuchet title in English hands with his new invention of
the “ward-a-matic egg flinging trebuchet”
Joel Hicks,
World Gravy Wrestling Champion, will again be in attendance
and acting as target for the Target Throwing event.
This
year’s events will be:
• Two person throw and
catch
• Static relay.
• Target throwing
• Egg
trebuchet
• Russian Egg Roulette.
Full information
on the disciplines can be gained via www.eggthrowing.com.
The World Egg Throwing Championships are to be held on Sunday the 24th of June at Swaton in Lincolnshire and are be hosted by Swaton Vintage Day.
All monies raised by the event are used to support local, national and international good causes such ads Leukaemia Research, The Red Cross, Air Ambulance provision, Children’s Hospices, and Shelter Box.
No chickens will be hurt during the championships.
ENDS