Art & Entertainment | Book Reviews | Education | Entertainment Video | Health | Lifestyle | Sport | Sport Video | Search

 


Fresh Start for Parents in 2014

For Release: 14 January 2014

Fresh Start for Parents in 2014

The beginning of the working year may well be the time to do something positive about unacceptable teenage behaviour, says the parent support organisation, TOUGHLOVE.

“For many families, the summer break may not have been the time of relaxation and enjoyment they were hoping for. Instead, long-simmering issues of teen behaviour may have boiled to the surface, causing tension, trauma and all-round unhappiness for the entire family.

“In other cases, long-recognised problems may not been resolved by time together as a family, leaving parents drained and suffering from a sense of hopelessness and failure, even before the working year gets under way,” says TOUGHLOVE Auckland’s CEO, Geoff Andrews.

“However, the commencement of a new working year can also be the time for a fresh approach to solving problems which, if unaddressed, have the potential to destroy families and wreck the lives of parent and child alike. A good way to start is to contact TOUGHLOVE, by telephoning our freephone number (0800 868 445) or visiting our website (www.toughlove.org.nz),” he adds.

This year, TOUGHLOVE will celebrate thirty years of running Parent Support Groups across New Zealand, providing a sympathetic forum for tens of thousands of demoralised mothers and fathers, along with the opportunity to learn and share effective and proven strategies for coping with unacceptable teen behaviour.

Such behaviour can range from failure to do homework or refusal to help around the house to defiance, truancy from school, promiscuity, the abuse of other family members, drug or alcohol usage or staying out all night. And, sometimes, a parent might be living in fear of a potentially violent son or daughter, who might also be a threat to younger siblings.

“Typically, those attending our support groups are sensible and conscientious people, who’ve been dragged down by situations they’d have thought completely manageable, until it happened to them and their child. Shame, grief, embarrassment, zero self-esteem and a range of stress-related medical symptoms are the norm, with many describing themselves as ‘jelly fish parents’.

“Unacceptable teenage behaviour is found right across New Zealand, in every social, economic or educational quartile and across all sorts of family units, including single parent families, blended families, nuclear families and families with same-sex parents. If not adequately dealt with, it can have a devastating effect on relationships and totally blight the lives, educational achievements and prospects of the young people concerned.

“Nor does teen behaviour just affect the nuclear family. It can also impact on grandparents, uncles, aunties, cousins, friends, neighbours and even work colleagues,” says Mr Andrews, adding that TOUGHLOVE receives many calls from grandparents, concerned about the stresses on their sons and daughters, as a result of their grandchildren’s unacceptable behaviour.

“It can take courage, emotional honesty and self-knowledge for parents to admit that they can’t cope unaided and need to reach out for support. But, once parents are willing to acknowledge that they do have a problem and want things to change, TOUGHLOVE can normally help them to ensure that this change actually happens.

“Our support group facilitators aren’t professionals but volunteers who’ve all been through similar experiences and come out the other side with restored confidence, enhanced insight and, in most cases, improved health and well-being. They won’t lay down the law as to what stressed parents should do but they will help them set practical, weekly goals aimed at improving the situation at home.

“Contrary to a widespread misconception, TOUGHLOVE does NOT stand for a harsh and punitive approach to dealing with out-of-control teens. Instead, we stress that teenagers need a clear sense of structure, boundaries and consequences. Our name reflects the realisation that parenting is a tough job and that love will always be an essential part of it,” says Mr Andrews.

A survey completed in 2012 found that 91 percent of parents attending TOUGHLOVE groups would recommend the experience to other parents.

Further information concerning TOUGHLOVE is available at www.toughlove.org.nz or by telephoning the freephone number: 0800 868 445.

ENDS

© Scoop Media

 
 
 
 
 
Culture Headlines | Health Headlines | Education Headlines

 
Scoop Review Of Books: The Typewriter Factory

I finished reading Don’t Dream It’s Over not long after it came out last August. I even started writing a review, which took something of an ‘I’m sorry people, but it’s already over’ approach. I’ve been pretty negative about journalism as it’s practiced in the mainstream (or MSM, or corporate media or liberal media or whatever terminology you prefer) for quite some time (see for example Stop the Press), and I believe the current capitalist media model is destructive and can’t be reformed. More>>

Sheep Update: Solo World Shearing Record Broken In Southland

Southland shearer Leon Samuels today set a new World solo eight-hours strongwool ewe-shearing after a tally of 605 in a wool shed north of Gore. More>>

ALSO:

Howard Davis Review: Dick Frizzell At The Solander Gallery

One of the most influential and celebrated contemporary Pop artists working in New Zealand, Dick Frizzell is mostly known for his appropriation of kitsch Kiwiana icons, which he often incorporates into cartoon-like paintings and lithographs. Not content with adhering to one particular style, he likes to adopt consciously unfashionable styles of painting, in a manner reminiscent of Roy Lichtenstein. More>>

Old Music: Pop Icon Adam Ant Announces NZ Tour

Following his recent sold out North American and UK tours, Adam Ant is celebrating the 35th anniversary of the release of his landmark KINGS OF THE WILD FRONTIER album with a newly-remastered reissue (Sony Legacy) and Australasian tour. More>>

Scoop Review Of Books:
Looking Back

Writing a memoir that appeals to a broad readership is a difficult undertaking. As an experienced communicator, Lloyd Geering keeps the reader’s interest alive through ten chapters (or portholes) giving views of different aspects of his life in 20th-century New Zealand. More>>

Scoop Review Of Books: Purple (and Violet) Prose

This is the second recent conjoint publication by Reeve and Stapp; all to do with esoteric, arcane and obscure vocabulary – sesquipedalian, anyone – and so much more besides. Before I write further, I must stress that the book is an equal partnership between words and images and that one cannot thrive without the other. More>>

Get More From Scoop

 
 

LATEST HEADLINES

 
 
 
 
Culture
Search Scoop  
 
 
Powered by Vodafone
NZ independent news