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NOT SHARP: Five Bright Ideas For The Very Dim

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NOT SHARP: Bright Ideas For The Very Dim

Five not so sharp suggestions for everyday life…

1. A mouse trap, placed on top on of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep.

2. Old telephone books make ideal personal address books. Simply cross out the names and addresses of people you don't know.

3. Before attempting to remove stubborn stains from a garment always circle the stain in permanent ink pen so that when you remove the garment from the washing machine you can easily locate the area of the stain and check that it has gone.

4. Lose weight quickly by eating raw pork and rancid tuna. I found that the subsequent food poisoning enabled me to lose 12 pounds in only 2 days.

5. Avoid parking tickets by leaving your windshield wipers turned to fast wipe whenever you leave your car parked illegally.

- Author unknown, found circulating on the Internet by a reader WHO HAS WON BEER!!!

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