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Wellington's Most Attractive

The Napkin Diaries
By Paula Pistol
Wellington’s Most Attractive

Phew. It’s over. Doesn’t Wellington look tousled and ragged as if it’s had a good shag? Highlights of the festivals for me were: Swan Lake; Rota; the Cubans; The World’s Wife; Victor Rodger’s tight, taut Ranterstantrum; CL Bob and Len Lye’s films in Scratch; Jo Randerson’s Banging Cymbal Clanging Gong; Carla Van Zon’s impressive collection of skirts; Glenda Tuaine’s excellent trouser selection; the dancefloor action at the Dans Paleis; and for sheer silliness, the on-stage climax of the mockumentary 5-Minute Call, which won the Pelorous Trust Creativity Grant among other Top of the Fringe awards.

The consequences of dancing 'til close at the last night of the Dans Paleis were discovered in our handbags on Sunday morning.

Gita Mann collected a surplus cellphone, while Sarah Barr turned up a swag of telephone numbers beginning with the Netherlands’ 0031 area code.

Meanwhile, my handbag revealed a napkin upon which the girls had helped me to compile a list of Wellington’s Most Attractive, inspired by the mad rush to find oneself a human hot water bottle as winter approaches. With apologies to those who are attached, I’m happy to share the list.

Catherine Chidgey may have won the $60,000 Prize in Modern Letters, but Glenn Schaeffer, the American philanthropist, won first place on my list. Sarah Barr noticed hot Bill Manhire graduates Karl Shuker and Rachael King at various Readers’ and Writers’ week events.

Gita chose two men who have kept her fed and watered throughout the festival – Ed from Ed’s Juice Bar and Matt from Deluxe. Always a fan of bartenders, Wanda punted for Motel’s James, Matterhorn’s Sam, and Jason Whyte from The Pit. If you haven’t discovered this wee gem next to Bats, Jason is rumoured to be keen to concentrate on his acting, so get down there for a lager while you still can.

Jeremy Randerson makes the list for his interpretive dance skills as a speedo-clad sea-tiger in 5-Minute Call, alongside sultry Copenhagen costume designer Alice Tinning, whose Vagina Monologues set is revealed this weekend. And for getting me into more shows than I could afford, I nominate festival publicity cuties Hannah Brown, Paula Granger and Amanda Hereaka.

Now that I know where I’m setting my sights, what’s next in this city of delights?

It seems entirely fitting that, after Wellington has been chocker-block with international actors, musicians and dancers, this weekend we celebrate Race Unity Day.

My human rights lawyer friend Frida “leave your guns at the door” Worlde is encouraging everybody to bring their flags, songs and national costumes to the parade which starts at 10.30 on Saturday at Justice Park, bottom of Lambton Quay.

If anyone on my Most Attractive list is keen to show me their mettle, that’s where I’ll be.

Want to write to Paula Pistol and co? Click here... Also published at Spectator.co.nz

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