Book Reviews | Gordon Campbell | News Flashes | Scoop Features | Scoop Video | Strange & Bizarre | Search

 


Bernard Weiner: Inside Saddam Hussein's War Diary

Inside Saddam Hussein's War Diary: Hot Damn! It's Showtime!


By Bernard Weiner
The Crisis Papers

Dear Diary: This is a tough one. If I hang in there, I may just survive to carry out my plans. But if I make a wrong move, or misinterpret the wide variety of signals coming my way, I'm vaporized toast.

Oh, I know I could take the advice of some Arab leaders and go into exile, in Lybia or Egypt or somewhere, with tons of money made available to me. If I thought I could do so by setting up a new Iraqi government that the Americans would accept -- but which would welcome me back when the time is right, or that I could control from outside the country -- I'd probably do it. I don't really want to be nuked in my bunker.

But, God help me, I do get off on this cat-and-mouse game, I really do. It stirs my blood. Most of the time, I'm bored, just raking in the loot, building more palaces, wiping out another corps of officers, target-practicing on some Kurds. It's when the West, and especially the U.S., comes after me that I really enjoy. It's showtime!

It's scary, no doubt about it. No more balancing me off against the Iranians; they want me out of here this time, either by the exile route or by offing me with missiles, incinerating me in my bunker, or an assassin's bullet, purchased for millions of U.S. dollars. There are all too many who would love to do the deed.

Heard this great joke: An American reporter comes to Baghdad and asks people on the street what they think of Saddam Hussein. They all rush away; nobody will talk to him. Finally, one courageous fellow motions to the reporter to wait for him in an alley. The guy looks left and right and, when he sees that nobody is around to overhear, he slips into the alley. "Well," says the reporter, "what do you think of Saddam Hussein?" The man looks around nervously and whispers, "I like him."

So I'm not loved by my citizens. I've been in power this long because they fear me. I know that. They know that if they don't demonstrate total loyalty, they'll be fish bait. But they also see the handwriting on the wall: my time may be running out, the American calvary is riding in, and this time they may get me.

But maybe not. First, there is a worldwide anti-war movement that has affected governments in Europe and elsewhere -- even in England, the Americans' one ally. Next, the inspectors aren't finding anything -- and they won't; I've had four years to hide the stuff well, all over Iraq, in private basements, mosques, gardens, underground caverns, in berms along river banks, etc. They'd have to be here for a dozen years and, unless someone were to blab -- that's why we've got to prevent the inspectors from taking our scientists and their families abroad -- they'd still find nothing.

But the U.N. inspectors are my human shields. As long as they're here working -- thinking they'll maybe find something -- the Americans and their lackeys can't start the bombing campaign. So let the inspectors stay. We'll dump another 12,000 documents on them; who cares if those pages don't contain the full information they requested? It keeps them busy and gains me more time to figure out what to do next.

My worry is that Bush is so frothing at the mouth, like an enraged bull, that he'll do what his daddy did: warn the inspectors to get out immediately and then start the assault. And then it might be too late to arrange an escape.

My problem is that I've met someone bloodthirsty and lunatic. He's willing to risk the well-being of his country and countrymen. He doesn't care how many civilians and troops die. He loves the oil under our land. He sees himself as a savior of this part of the world -- hell, the whole world. He believes he's doing God's will. Am I looking into a mirror, or does George W. Bush bear a striking resemblance to me?

So, bring it on, Mr. Bush. I can take it. Mess with me, and you'll live to regret the day you tried to finish me off. The Muslim nation will rise up in righteousness against you. You, the great Satan country, will find yourself totally isolated in the world -- not even your puppet, England, will back you any longer -- and suicide bombers, or agents carrying biological timebombs, will enter your cities at will, wreaking havoc worse than you can even imagine.

If I die, I die. I'll become a Muslim martyr (even though I don't believe any of that stuff), and my name will be honored throughout the nation of Islam forever. Or, if it has to come to it, I'll live out my life in luxurious exile somewhere, and re-emerge later. Either way, I can't lose. Only America can lose.

**************

- Bernard Weiner, a playwright and poet, authored Inside Saddam Hussein's Diary: "I Don't Have to Show You No Stinkin' Anything!" last August. He is co-editor of The Crisis Papers ( http://www.crisispapers.org), and was a writer/editor with the San Francisco Chronicle for nearly 20 years.


© Scoop Media

 
 
 
 
 
Top Scoops Headlines

 

Werewolf: Living With Rio’s Olympic Ruins

Mariana Cavalcanti Critics of the Olympic project can point a discernible pattern in the delivery of Olympics-related urban interventions: the belated but rushed inaugurations of faulty and/or unfinished infrastructures... More>>

Live Blog On Now: Open Source//Open Society Conference

The second annual Open Source Open Society Conference is a 2 day event taking place on 22-23 August 2016 at Michael Fowler Centre in Wellington… Scoop is hosting a live blog summarising the key points of this exciting conference. More>>

ALSO:

Buildup:

Gordon Campbell: On The Politicising Of The War On Drugs In Sport

It hasn’t been much fun at all to see how “war on drugs in sport” has become a proxy version of the Cold War, fixated on Russia. This weekend’s banning of the Russian long jumper Darya Klishina took that fixation to fresh extremes. More>>

ALSO:

Binoy Kampmark: Kevin Rudd’s Failed UN Secretary General Bid

Few sights are sadder in international diplomacy than seeing an aging figure desperate for honours. In a desperate effort to net them, he scurries around, cultivating, prodding, wishing to be noted. Finally, such an honour is netted, in all likelihood just to shut that overly keen individual up. More>>

Open Source / Open Society: The Scoop Foundation - An Open Model For NZ Media

Access to accurate, relevant and timely information is a crucial aspect of an open and transparent society. However, in our digital society information is in a state of flux with every aspect of its creation, delivery and consumption undergoing profound redefinition... More>>

Keeping Out The Vote: Gordon Campbell On The US Elections

I’ll focus here on just two ways that dis-enfranchisement is currently occurring in the US: (a) by the rigging of the boundary lines for voter districts and (b) by demanding elaborate photo IDs before people are allowed to cast their vote. More>>

Ramzy Baroud: Being Black Palestinian - Solidarity As A Welcome Pathology

It should come as no surprise that the loudest international solidarity that accompanied the continued spate of the killing of Black Americans comes from Palestine; that books have already been written and published by Palestinians about the plight of their Black brethren. In fact, that solidarity is mutual. More>>

ALSO:


Get More From Scoop

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Top Scoops
Search Scoop  
 
 
Powered by Vodafone
NZ independent news