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Scoop Satire: Iraqi Girl’s Foot Liberated From Leg

EDITORS NOTE: Scoop is proud to host the online version of the Babylon Express satirical newspaper. Those easily offended and not often amused should avoid this content. See authors note at the end of this article for more information about the Babylon Express.

Iraqi Girl’s Foot Liberated From Leg

Baghdad: US military officials are hailing the liberation of a 12 year old Iraqi girl’s left foot from her leg as a “huge step forward” in winning the battle for the ‘hearts and minds’ of the Iraqi people.

“This was a foot that had been put under constant, unrelenting pressure by a leg that was, quite simply, Evil” said US Army Colonel Bud Faustus. “Now, thanks to a pinpoint bombing attack, this foot is free to do as it wishes, when it wishes. This is a great day for western democracy.”

The foot had originally been suffering beneath the burden of Aliah Taliq, 12. The liberation took place after a satellite photo gave US planners the ‘window of opportunity’ they needed when it was confirmed that Taliq was shopping at a marketplace in Baghdad.

Taliq was unavailable for comment. However family members shouted messages of grief, hatred, and defiance for the armed forces of the ‘Coalition of the Willing’, a response that the US Army sources described as “encouraging.”

In addition to the foot, an Iraqi man’s brains were liberated from his skull, another’s legs were liberated from his hips, and, in a PR coup for the Pentagon, a 57 year old woman had her intestines liberated from her stomach.

**** ENDS ****

- The Babylon Express is a satirical newspaper published randomly in Wellington. Copies are so far only available in local shops whose proprietors haven't got sticks up their arses. Those interested in acquiring previous or upcoming print edition copies should contact the editor at bexpress69@hotmail.com or subscribe at the online home of the Babylon Express (including previous online articles) here on Scoop at: http://scoop.co.nz/mason/features/?s=bex. Contributions and suggestions are always very welcome. Cheers.

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