Rosalea’s Recipe IV Recession Recovery

::Ban the B-words!::
Bonuses. Banks. Billions. Bailout. Budget. Yes, even Barack—of whom we are sick of the sight. Ban the lot of them from our daily discourse!

::Bring back Roman numerals!::
For one thing, there is no zero in the Latin numbering system, so computers will go out the window immediately. Instant trading in stocks and commodities will end, and millions of jobs will open up for people to laboriously calculate everything by hand. And millions of jobs will be created even before that to teach people how to use the new system.

::Save kisses for love, not money!::
While we’re getting rid of Arabic numerals we might as well get rid of the legacy of another group of descendants of Shem—usury. In any case, who would dare to charge XXX percent interest on a credit card balance when those letters have such strong non-monetary connotations?

::Red shift, Blue shift::
Legislate a seven-day business week combined with a three-and a-half-day work week. The Red shift would work one half of the week, the Blue shift would work the other. That puts twice as many people to work immediately!

And if you have a one-hour handover time midweek, only half as many cars will be on the road even at that commute time, reducing pollution! Yes, I know, there’ll be lots more commute times but this is classic smoke and mirrors, baby, the true American Way.

True, individuals will be earning less and businesses paying more in wages and utility bills, but instead of the state and federal government paying money directly to the unemployed, they can funnel it to them through employers in some form of business subsidy.

::Charge $1 for everything::
Why not?

Yours in frustration,

rosalea.barker@gmail.com

--PEACE—

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