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www.mccully.co.nz - 8 June 2007

www.mccully.co.nz - 8 June 2007

A Weekly Report from the Keyboard of Murray McCully MP for East Coast Bays

Dr Bewildered Departs

The circumstances behind the early departure of Secretary of Labour, Dr James Bewildered may have escaped the scrutiny of the nation’s media. But regular readers of this journal will be aware that the Bewildered Era at the Department of Labour was brought to an end by a negotiated arrangement with the State Services Commissioner. Dr Bewildered got the chance to jump before being pushed.

The Bewildered Era was discredited before it even got seriously under way. One of the good doctor’s first acts was to preside over a failed cover-up of the “Lie in Unison” Immigration Service email scandal that subsequently saw several heads roll. No serious Parliamentarian respected him after that. And a reorganisation of the Department designed to abolish those components that offended his Labour Party masters (especially the Labour Market Policy Unit) resulted in more or less complete dysfunction.

So what better and more fitting way to celebrate the end of the Bewildered Era at the Department of Labour than a function with all of the class and style that it deserved: Yes, a BYO farewell for Dr Bewildered. One which desperate DOL managers had to coerce dozens of unwilling staff to attend. And to bring their own drinks, just to add insult to injury. Or rub salt into the wound (select cliché of choice here).

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A Dose of Dyson

Just what could be worse than being forced to attend a farewell function for a failed chief executive who has left a department in disarray – a function, remember, to which one is expected to bring ones own liquor? Easy. One at which one must also endure a speech from the unctuous Ruth Dyson.

The news media, showing some sense of news judgment, did not report the address delivered by Minister Dyson. But today we have decided to treat readers to a few brief excerpts. And to provide a translation service as well:

“You have been a public service chief executive for the last 11 years and during this time you have worked with 13 Ministers and many more stakeholders.”

(It has taken a while for any Minister to be around long enough for the annual review process to be able to catch up with you).

“You have been involved in the challenging task of determining the purpose and scope of the organisation in order to respond to an ever-changing labour market and operating environment.”

(I really appreciate the way in which you have carried out the Labour Party’s desire to nuke the parts of the Department that gave honest advice that we hated and put in place the cringing, politically correct regime that has descended into total dysfunction today.)

“This work has put the Department in a very strong and healthy position to achieve its future goals.”

(No one on the outside will notice that the result has been a total cock-up for quite a while yet – certainly not until after the next election.)

“The direction you have set for the Department is aligned with today’s labour market, focusing on quality jobs, lifting skills, raising the value of work, and being well connected and internationally competitive.”

(You have been pretty well the perfect Labour Party patsy.)

“You have developed incredibly strong relationships across the Department and the many sectors the Department works with.”

(I can hardly admit that you are being shunted out by the State Services Commissioner because all of those groups have lost confidence, or say that everybody inside and outside the Department is breathing a sigh of relief.)

“Last year that relationship was further strengthened by the four of us participating in a study tour to Ireland, Finland and the UK.”

(This man has pictures and if we don’t play the game they will be in the next edition of “Investigate”.)

“You have of course also worked with my colleague David Cunliffe Minister of Immigration. David couldn’t be here tonight but he wanted me to let you know that his is grateful for the assistance and support he received from you and your team…”

(David Cunliffe is in the pictures too.)

“Both David and I will miss your humour, your good nature and your sage advice.”

(Neither of us can remember what is in the pictures but we are assuming the worst.)

“I have no doubt James that you will be a success at whatever you do in the future and I know you will continue to use your skills to contribute to the betterment of New Zealand.”

(Just hand over the negatives and there will be a couple of really good, well remunerated jobs in it for you.)

The Carvell Case

The case for unlawful possession of a firearm against Auckland gunshop proprietor Greg Carvell was yesterday thrown out by two Justices of the Peace. And good on them. The Police are attempting to suggest that Mr Carvell was lucky not to have faced more serious charges. And Crown Law say they are considering their options. None of which is very encouraging. They were foolish to have laid the charges in the first place.

Mr Carvell was peacefully running his business. One day a criminal thug entered his shop waving a bayonet, threatening to decapitate Mr Carvell and an associate. Mr Carvell shot him, with the fortunate consequence that neither he nor his friend were decapitated, and the criminal thug was thus denied access to the available supply of weaponry and ammunition. A regrettable situation. But one in which unquestionably the best outcome was achieved.

The Police decision to charge Mr Carvell is not quite up there with their decision to charge Northland farmer Paul McIntyre after he shot one of several thugs attempting to steal property from his isolated back country farm. But it is close.

You see, there is something quite fundamental about the Carvell case and the case of Mr McIntyre that the Police appear not to understand. Both of these men are VICTIMS. It is disconcerting that some Police desk jockeys do not have the judgment to understand this, or to see that a decision to press charges results in massive defence costs, serious trauma and major family upheaval for people who did not go looking for trouble, and who are, by any measurement, VICTIMS. People who no judge, jury or Justice of the Peace with an ounce of common sense is going to convict.

So as the Police and Crown Law contemplate the outcome of the Carvell case, here’s hoping that they pause to consider the faint possibility that perhaps they are being sent a message: stop wasting our time and stop inflicting needless cost and suffering on people who have already, through no fault of their own, suffered enough.

ENDS

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