Thank You For The Tax Increase, Mr Smith

Thank You For The Tax Increase, Mr Smith

Libertarianz leader Richard McGrath heaped praise on Climate Change Minister Nick Smith for lifting energy prices today, but said the BlueLabour Government was far too lenient on Big Business and should have increased petrol and diesel prices by 50 cents a litre and imposed power blackouts on private homes in the face of the global warming Armageddon.

“Everyone who voted BlueLabour in 2008 will think back to 1 July 2010 as the day Dr Smith got medieval with free markets, with yet another shiny new tax. He’s right of course - what has capitalism ever done for humankind? And what hypothetical problem can’t be fixed by taking more money from private individuals and passing more legislation?”

“As we head into the coldest month of the year, pensioners and those on fixed incomes will nevertheless feel a warm fuzzy as they turn their heaters down to save power, knowing that Mr Key has more of their tax dollars to use keeping prisoners warm in their cells and to put aside for helping the poor darlings stop smoking next year.”

“I do have one question, Mr Smith. I know we are being rapidly boiled alive because of the climate cataclysm, but with global temperatures dropping for the past twelve years despite a steady rise in carbon dioxide emissions, can you just remind me again why this tax was necessary?”

“And don’t forget you farmers, business owners and industrialists out there – but most of all you consumers to whom these tax increases will be passed – don’t forget to vote for those nice BlueLabour people in 2011. And keep your party hats and balloons handy to celebrate the GST increase in October.”

“Finally, Mr Key, if you’re reading this, could I suggest a slogan for BlueLabour’s election campaign next year: Taxation – I’m Lovin’ It.”

ENDS