TV sets to be trashed in town
McGillicuddies will close their campaign and demonstrate their new, more moderate public face by smashing television sets in downtown Wellington tomorrow (Thursday, November 25).
“New Zealand has a strong vibrant culture of its own. Foreign culture and technology has no place here,” says Joseph Rastapopoulous, McGillicuddy Serious Well-Central campaign manager and dirty tricks specialist.
“Our small country is marching boldly forward over the precipice of the new millennium and it is time to throw off the yoke of global cultural conformity, embrace market forces, sit down with all parties concerned and really deliver the goods.”
Desperately groping for popular appeal as the party still fails to register in the opinion polls, the McGillicuddies are promising all things to everyone and abandoning their long-cherished ideals in a bid for the middle New Zealand vote.
“We’ve dumped all that extremist medieval stuff and are now looking more to the early 1970s as a model. We are quietly confident of a successful result on Saturday.”
“Nobody likes the rubbish on the telly these days. An anti-TV stance should be just the nudge we need to put us over the crucial 50 per cent mark,” says Mr Rastapopoulous.