Biotic Baking Brigade Pies Biotech Academic
Communique from the Biotic Baking Brigade (BBB)--Ecotopia Cell
11 April 2000
After a long hiatus, we swung into action today and delivered two pies to the kisser of Martina McClaughlin, Director of Biotechnology at the University of California at Davis.
The General Command of the BBB met earlier today spurred by an anonymous tip that a big biotechnology supporter was entering our stronghold of San Francisco, CA, U$A. After agents were chosen, it was just a matter of time before pies were to fly. BBB specially-trained agents had no problem infiltrating the building and patiently sat through the debate on genetically engineered organisms in the environment. As McClaughlin left the stage, Agent Chocolate Silk delivered the first edible projectile using the patented Pie Slam Dunk©. As she was freeing herself from an overly aggressive biotech supporter, Agent Raspberry snuck by the crowd and delivered a second helping of good ole cherry pie to the unsuspecting pie-ee.
"Director of Biotechnology" is an odd title for a person who merely lies on behalf of UC-Davis' heinous biotechnology program. According to McClaughlin, "Unless we will accept starvation or placing parks and the Amazon basin under the plow, there really is no alternative to applying biotechnology to agriculture. Biotechnology should be looked upon not only as a solution to problems but as a mechanism to improve the quality of life and the quality of the environment." This kind of corporate bullshit needs to be addressed!
UC-Davis is no stranger to biotechnology, having entertained deals with Monsanto and other multinationals. Similar to most publicly-funded universities, UC Davis relies on massive amounts of corporate funding to keep its extensive biotechnology program alive.
UC-Davis has come under fire in the last year for their role in promoting the dangerous technology known as biotech. Since 1999, their have been over four genetically engineered crops destroyed at UC-Davis; among them were Monsanto Round-Up Ready sugarbeets and GE corn, melons and tomatoes. Despite the evidence presented to the press, Ms. McClaughlin denied the nature of the crops instead choosing to call the crop pullers, "vandals."
UC-Davis (and the UC system in general) is no stranger to the BBB having received visits from us on various occasions: 1998's "Operation Double Fudge" in which we visited both UC Davis to pie Chancellor Vanderhoorf over a deal with Monsanto, and UC-Berkeley to pie Dean Gordon Rausser and Novartis President Doug Watson over the University's nefarious $25 Million deal with multinational giant Novartis. Last but not least, let us not forget the pie-ing of vivisector Russel DeValois on World Week for Animals in Labs last year either.
"We must resist the commodification of life at all coast--and by any means! If we stay silent while multinational corporations kill butterflies with GE corn, clone animals and destroy the environment with their genetically mutilated crops, than we deserve industrial society. We must continue to fight!" said Agent Chocolate Silk. This action is dedicated to you brave warriors out there resisting the biotech monster and changing the way Amerikans look at GMO's. You know who you are and you're an inspiration to us all.
In defense of pastry and all things sweet,
Special Agent Key Lime General Command of the Biotic Baking Brigade--Ecotopia Cell GC-BBB-EC