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Green Spots No Public Health Risk

Media Release
Avant Noir productions
Monday 31st October

Green Spots No Public Health Risk

Although green spots have been popping up all over town in Thames over the past few days … there is no cause for public alarm.

The source of the outbreak has now been linked to a Thames main street retailer. But Thames Payless Plastics new Manager, Denise Davis (who is also a registered nurse) assures us that the green spots are not infectious. “They are perfectly safe, look you can just peel them off”, she says, lifting one off her face without any sign of pain or bloodshed.

The green spots, which have been spotted in and around Pollen Street since the end of last week, are part of a quirky retail promotion dreamed up by Denise and the Thames Payless Plastics team, Debbie Ellis and Amaria Weir.

Denise says, “We decided to have a 30% OFF SELL-OUT, and as we were plotting the logistics, Amaria suddenly blurted out, “We need green dots”. Then the dots became SPOTS and the idea grew legs.

”Now you enter the room in the shop containing all the sale items, through a doorway of green spots, Debbie and Amaria are breaking out in green spots, and I’m running round town in hubbie’s ancient black tuxedo, which is sprouting green spots, delivering spotty green leaflets.

”Our bank manager has even been roped into the act because we’ve decided to award a prize to the person who comes closest to guessing how many green spots were around the doorway to the sale room on Monday night, and to make that fair we recorded the number on a green spot which is now in safe deposit at the bank.

“To be in line for the prize (an un-spotted sexy stainless steel Thermos) customers will need to bring in the one of the spotty green leaflets, or a copy of this story, and purchase a green spot 30% off spring sale item.”

WHERE ? ... PAYLESS PLASTICS, next to the Post Office,
Pollen Street Thames

WHEN ? … From 9am Wednesday 2nd November 2005


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