Top Scoops

Book Reviews | Gordon Campbell | Scoop News | Wellington Scoop | Community Scoop | Search


Sludge Report #57 – Why Dubya Should Say Sorry

Sludge Report #57 – Why Dubya Should Say Sorry

NOTE: Authors of this report will be anonymous and wide ranging, and occasionally finely balanced. Indeed you are invited to contribute: The format is as a reporters notebook. It will be published as and when material is available. C.D. Sludge can be contacted at The Sludge Report is available as a free email service..Click HERE - to subscribe...

Sludge Report #57

Why Dubya Should Say Sorry

This morning on the wires we learn that after half a weekend’s reflection, US President George “Dubya” Bush remains resolutely opposed to saying “sorry” over the South China Sea spy plane incident which has plunged Chinese/US relations into their darkest funk for a decade or two.

The argument that Dubya and his advisors appear to have bought into holds that as the accident happened in international airspace it is no one’s fault. And certainly not theirs.

Sludge has formulated a simple explanation for why this argument fails at almost every step.

Imagine for a moment that China is not a country, but rather is just an ordinary suburban house somewhere.

The house is occupied by John, who for some reason or other Dubya and his friends want to keep an eye on.

Dubya sends off one of his minions, Chuck, armed with a range of high tech spying equipment, cameras, listening devices etc. to spy on John’s house.

The minion takes up position in the road reserve – public property.

He listens away to John’s conversations with his special equipment. He takes pictures through the windows, and of people coming and going. Basically does the usual stuff you might expect spies would do.

Everything is fine until John’s dog challenges Chuck in the bushes. “Woof, woof,” says John’s dog. The dog then bites Chuck on his ankle. John hits the dog with his camera stand, killing it dead.

In severe pain, with blood pouring out of his ankle, Chuck knocks on John’s door and asks him to ring the hospital.

John, unsurprisingly, wonders what has happened to his dog. On learning his faithful and loyal friend is now dead he asks Chuck what he was doing in the bushes.

Chuck replies that he has been spying on John, but that as it is public property he is entitled to lurk in John’s bushes if he wants.

John, unsurprisingly, finds this explanation rather unsatisfactory. Nevertheless being a forgiving person he asks Chuck to apologise. Chuck says he was only following orders and refers John back to Dubya, who sent him on his errand in the first place.

Dubya tells John that though he “regrets” the death of his faithful dog, as the dog bit Chuck on public property, it is neither Chuck’s nor his fault that the dog is now dead. And No, he won’t apologise.

John at this point decides to commandeer Chuck’s spy equipment, securing it away in his shed, and decides to ring the police rather than the hospital.

Now ask yourself. Should Dubya apologise or not?

Anti©opyright Sludge 2001

© Scoop Media

Top Scoops Headlines


Gordon Campbell : On Dealing With Impeccable, Impeachable Lies

By now, the end game the Republican Senate majority has in mind in their setting of the rules for the impeachment trial of Donald J. Trump is pretty clear to everyone: first deny the Democrats the ability to call witnesses and offer evidence, and then derisively dismiss the charges for lack of evidence. For his part, does former security adviser John Bolton really, really want to testify against his former boss? If there was any competing faction within the Republican Party, there might be some point for Bolton in doing so – but there isn’t. More>>

Gordon Campbell: On Why The Dice Are Loaded Against Women In Public Life

If they enter public life, women can expect a type of intense (and contradictory) scrutiny that is rarely applied to their male counterparts... More>>

Gordon Campbell: On The Harry/Meghan Affair, And Iran

Those “Meghzit” headlines seem apt, given how closely Britain’s January 31 exit from the European Union resembles the imminent departure from the Royal Family’s top team of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle. For young Iranians, the accidental downing of the Ukrainian airliner is just the latest example of the deadly incompetence and dishonesty of their leaders... More>>

Gordon Campbell: On The Iran Aftermath

So, evidently, you can get away with murder. It looks as though a further escalation in the ongoing war between Iran and the US has been avoided – mainly thanks to Iran NOT responding in kind to the recklessly unhinged behaviour by the United States. Given the massive outpouring of public grief in Iran over the murder of Qassem Soleimani, some reciprocal action by Iran was necessary, but (so far) it has been almost entirely symbolic in nature... More>>

Gordon Campbell: On The Aussie Bush Fires And Suleimani

In popular culture, Australia is often portrayed as Western civilisation’s last unspoiled frontier, or as its final refuge from planetary disaster. In Nevil Shute’s best-selling 1950s novel On The Beach for instance, Melbourne served as the backdrop ... More>>

Gordon Campbell: On The Best Music Of 2019

This was a year where so many of the highlights came from female musicians. But amid all that richness, there was one standout album... More>>