Top Scoops

Book Reviews | Gordon Campbell | Scoop News | Wellington Scoop | Community Scoop | Search

 

Lyndon Hood: Brownlee Fighting To The Finnish

Brownlee Fighting To The Finnish

Satire by Lyndon Hood

Gerry Brownlee,
angry birds, Finland
Click for big version.

SCOOP: So this Finland thing...

GERRY BROWNLEE: Well it was meant to be humorous.

SCOOP: Humorous?

BROWNLEE: You know, a joke!

SCOOP: About what malnourished woman-hating murderers the Finns are?

BROWNLEE: No no no: based on what malnourished woman-hating murderers the Finns are, but about the Labour Party.

SCOOP: So...

BROWNLEE: Ha, ha, Labour Party. You'd have to be pretty Finnish not to see that it my comments were satirical.

SCOOP: So what do you mean by satirical?

BROWNLEE: Well, like, maybe something that was mean to be funny but it wasn't really. But with a core of truth.

SCOOP: And what core is that?

BROWNLEE: Well, there is a real country, called Finland.

SCOOP: Isn't satire forbidden in Parliament?

BROWNLEE: No, no it forbidden to use footage of Parliament for satire. It's like 'bringing Parliament into disrepute'. It's all right if it's just us doing it.

SCOOP: Okay. So, satire is often associated with the use of irony...

BROWNLEE: Irony. Yes, that's it, sorry. I was being ironic.

SCOOP: So what was the underlying meaning?

BROWNLEE: The who?

SCOOP: What were you actually trying to say, if you were being ironic about abusing Finland.

BROWNLEE: Can I have a clue?

SCOOP: Well was it, for example, an ironic commentary on parliamentarians and the kind of torture they put a factoid through once it enters the legislative chamber?

BROWNLEE: Oh, no. Well, obviously if you want to be all post-structural and examine it purely as a textual artefact without reference to the intentions of the author then it might be an excellent example of, of, what you said. But no, I was thinking of just generally ironic.

SCOOP: Like ten thousand spoons?

BROWNLEE: No thanks, I carry one with me.

SCOOP: By generally ironic you mean...

BROWNLEE: You know, like, 'ooh, look at me saying this'. (Makes finger-quotes:) "Oooh scary Finland."

SCOOP: Sort of postmodern irony.

BROWNLEE: Yes?

SCOOP: So you basically didn't mean it.

BROWNLEE: "Yes."

SCOOP: You have to admit that basically you were – in Parliament, as leader of the House – exaggeratedly abusing the people of another country to score cheap political points.

BROWNLEE: Exactly! Clever, eh? Guess that's why I'm earning the big bucks and you're just writing made up interviews with politicians.

SCOOP: Are you sorry?

BROWNLEE: Well, I'd love to apologise for the Finns but I'm really not responsible for them.

SCOOP: Will you apologise to the Finnish government?

BROWNLEE: Well I'm sorry if they got offended. They don't need that on top of all their other troubles. Like having to live in Finland.

SCOOP: The Prime Minister has expressed his regrets to President of Finland.

BROWNLEE: Well I'm sorry about that too.

SCOOP: So do you think that should settle things?

BROWNLEE: Yes, I consider the matter Finnished. Ha ha. Just kidding. Love you guys.

SCOOP: Mr Brownlee, thank you.

BROWNLEE: Didn't mean to Nok-ya, Finland. Heh.

********

Got feedback? Leave a comment on Lyndon's blog!

You can follow @lyndonhood on Twitter.

© Scoop Media

 
 
 
Top Scoops Headlines

 



Gordon Campbell: On The Lancet’s Stance Against The Olympic Games, And On The US Culture Battles Over Abortion

Yesterday - barely a month before the opening ceremony - the Lancet medical journal has called for a global conversation on whether the Olympics should go ahead. But who is able to take part in that conversation? Not the hosts, evidently. In poll after poll, a huge majority of the Japanese people have made it clear they do not want to host the Games... More>>

Binoy Kampmark: Vague Alternatives And G7 Summitry: The Build Back Better World Initiative

Summits often feature grand statements and needless fripperies. In Cornwall, the leaders of the G7 countries were trying to position and promote their relevance as the vanguard of democratic good sense and values... More>>


Suicidal Games: Tokyo’s Coronavirus Olympics

A pandemic crisis. A state of emergency. Overwhelming public opinion bristling with alarm. Notwithstanding these factors, Tokyo is still on track to host the Olympics that was cancelled last year in response to the global pandemic. The first sports team – Australia’s softball crew – has touched down. Is all this folly, bravery or self-interest?.. More>>


How It All Went Wrong: The Global Response To COVID-19

The Independent Panel for Pandemic Preparedness and Response was never likely to hand down a rosy report with gobbets of praise. Organised by the World Health Organization Director-General Tedros Adhanom Ghebreyesus last May, the panel’s gloomy assessment was grim: the COVID-19 pandemic could have been avoided... More>>



The Conversation: Is Natural Gas Really Cheaper Than Renewable Electricity?

Climate Explained is a collaboration between The Conversation, Stuff and the New Zealand Science Media Centre to answer your questions about climate change... More>>

Keith Rankin: The New Zealand Government’s 'Public Finance Rabbithole'

Last week, out of left field, the government placed a three-year embargo on normal public sector wage bargaining, essentially a salary freeze. While there has been a certain amount of backtracking since, it is clear that the government has been ... More>>