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The New Write 5/4/2002


Official Newsletter of the New Zealand Young Nationals

5th April 2002

"I only made one prayer, when I said, 'Lord, make my enemies
ridiculous.' And God granted it."

– Voltaire



The Young Nationals Annual Conference ended last week after three successful days.

"A key theme from conference speakers and delegates was one of sticking to National's values of freedom, individual responsibility and less government," Young Nationals Chair Grant Tyrrell said.

"A persistent example throughout conference was the black-hole of any budget - health spending. Flinging money at the problem will be no solution. National's policy will have to be innovative and address the systemic problems in health.

"A Young Nationals remit passed at conference calls for a National government to concentrate on properly funding health services without being concerned whether providers are public or private.

"Other remits included a policy of throwing away the key for New Zealand's worst criminals. Ending the inequity of the current student allowances policy, based on parental income and to reinstate honours titles.

"Conference condemned the Labour regime for its failure to reinstate the Emergency Unemployment Benefit and noted the irony that unemployed 'artists' were eligible to benefits.

Young Nationals continue to oppose the government in the market place with remits passed to sell both TVNZ and the struggling Kiwibank.

"In keeping with National's principles a remit was passed to end racial quotas on tertiary level courses. It is a slight to Maori and patently unfair to have such quotas. On one hand it suggests that a section of society is more deserving than another and on the other it insults Maori with the suggestion that otherwise they would not otherwise be skilled enough to enter the course," Grant Tyrrell commented.

"Young Nationals are in good heart, with almost 50 delegates from around the country, attending. We are now in full campaign mode and look forward to our next conference when National is in government," said Mr Tyrrell.


An interactive poll on the National Party website is helping Jim Anderton decide a new name for his party.

The poll, at www.national.org.nz attracted over 5000 votes. There were 12 choices:

*New New Labour
*The Jim Anderton Party: Leader - Jim Anderton
*They Left Us, We Didn't Leave Them Party
*The Judean People's Front
*Pretty Much The Labour Party I Love Being a Minister Party
*The "This is Totally Different to Alamein
*Leaving the Alliance" Party
*The Party Formerly Known as the Alliance
*The Non-Alliance
*The Alliance II: Grumpy Old Men
*Social Credit Mark IV
*Jim IL Sung Party

The official winner, with nearly 2500 votes was “I Love Being A Minister Party”.

National MP Annabel Young says the poll was designed to help Mr Anderton come up with a fresh name for his latest Party.

"Jim Anderton has been through so many parties that he must be running out of ideas. The number of parties and MPs he has been involved with, and who have dumped him, is staggering. They include Labour, New Labour, The Liberals, The Greens, Frank Grover and Christian Heritage, Alamein Kopu, Pam Corkery, and now the entire Alliance Party."


Young Nationals Chair Grant Tyrrell has insisted on a tribute to the Queen Mother who passed away on the weekend. As a monarchist I am ambivalent but I will include this brief line from Grant.

“The princesses will not leave without me, I will not leave without the King and the King will never leave.” – Queen Elizabeth, 1940, during the blitz of London.

RIP Queen Mum 1900 - 2002


Hot Goss is rapidly becoming one of the most popular features - even MPs are eagerly reading about juicy gossip from the Capital. If you have any goss to share please send it to newwrite@national.org.nz .

*Marian Hobbs has appointed yet another Labour crony into a lucrative board job. This time it is former Labour Cabinet Minister Dame Ann Hercus who has been appointed to the TVNZ Board, despite the fact she is still an active corporate fundraiser for Labour.

*There is division within Young Labour over who to support as their 'youth' candidate for the Party list. Young red-head Darren Hughes is standing in Otaki, New Zealand's beneficiary capital, but he is not popular with many Young Labourites because he is seen as too right wing. The preferred choice of the Loony Left is Moana Mackey, daughter of current MP Janet Mackey.

*Coalition building between ACT and National has well and truly begun - there are at least three cross-party relationships well under way. National staffers have been heard to complain about the ACT boys "coming over and stealing our women."

*Christian Heritage leader Graham Capill has recently celebrated the birth of his 10th child. This from a party which preaches abstinence to young people...

*Jim Anderton claimed he was consulting with the Alliance membership over his future, but it now emerges that he had ordered newspaper ads and membership forms at least a week before he made his announcement this week.

*Labour rebel Nick Kelly has written an expose of his troubled time within the Labour Party and how he was kicked out of the Party for being too radical. The article is no longer on Scoop, but has found it’s way into my hands. Here are some of the highlights:

-The Labour Party only has 10,000 members, about 2,000 of which are active.

-The Rimutaka electorate, one of the safest Labour seats in the country, only attracts two or three people to it’s committee meetings. Are they held in a phone booth?

-Young Labour were hardly supportive of young Nick –he was ostracised for daring to criticise St Helen.

-Mr Kelly says Labour has “sold out to the people who supported it, and seems to be moving further to the right by the hour.”

*Cabinet Minister Lianne Dalziel has increased the embarassment to Labour – she accidentally hit ‘reply all’ to Nick’s email and sent her nasty reply to over 500 media and political groups. Whoops.

If you would like a full copy of this fascinating article send me an email and I’ll forward it onto you. Till next week...my lips are sealed!


1. Encourage Jim Anderton to send out a questionnaire-cum-letter to
all rugby fans worldwide, with multiple-choice check-boxes, to decide
the future of the game.

2. Threaten to put the Greens on the Referee Panel so that all games
end in a draw and every country gets an equal turn with the Cup.

3. Get Bob Jones to write a witty satirical novel about the Australian Rugby Union entitled "Sod off you useless bunch of mongrel dingo drongoes".

4. Get Jim Anderton to supply all visiting players with locally made possum fur gloves.

5. Ensure the final decision is predetermined by stacking IRB meetings with trade union delegates.

6. Offer to assist with security by committing our SAS to build latrines at World Cup venues.

7. Get John Banks to chair the next meeting of the IRB and forcibly eject any Australian protestors who are present.

8. Plug for Glassons as the official black pants supplier to the Rugby World Cup with Helen Clark as mascot.

9. Threaten to bore the IRB to death by dispatching Pete Hodgson to talk to them about innovation.

10. If there is a need for "clean" stadiums in New Zealand, put the 10,000 people on the artists dole to useful work cleaning them...

St Molesworth


Two great websites this week:


Very funny pictures of some hot George W babes – but not for the squeamish. Thanks Craig for this site.

www.andrewsullivan.com - an excellent writer and columnist, with some great articles on the Bush administration. Thanks to Phil for this site.

Any views expressed here are not necessarily those of New Zealand Young Nationals, or the New Zealand National Party.

Contributions, feedback, articles and subscriptions welcome. Email

Editor: Phil Rennie

© Scoop Media

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