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Stateside: Yul-Brynner-in-a-Tin-Skirt Weekend

Stateside With Rosalea Barker

Yul-Brynner-in-a-Tin-Skirt Weekend

::What Would NonExisto Do?::

"If I was in Boston I wouldn't have forgotten it was Easter," a workmate said on Friday. He was relating how he'd parked his usual three blocks from the BART commuter train station thinking that he was too late to get a parking space, but in fact the carpark was more than half deserted.

This despite people having to use their vacation time to have a day off on Easter Friday and/or Monday because it isn't a federal holiday here in the US. Which must be the only country on the American continents (and the Caribbean, for that matter) that doesn't give its folks one or both of those days off.

You really have to wonder why the predominant religion can't get it together to extend their Christian generosity to people of all faiths with a paid holiday at this time of year. When I first came here, I thought the lack was just a church-state separation thing, or a non-discrimination thing, but increasingly I think it's a "don't upset the people who don't accept Jesus was the son of G-d" thing.

I make that point only because I find it weird that a country that continually trumpets its Christian values is at war with countries whose religion (Islam) DOES accept that Jesus was a prophet, in order to protect a country (Israel) whose religion denies any such thing. Go figure!

::Nail that PEEP to a tree!::

Some shopping malls have even gone so far as to call the Easter Bunny the Spring Bunny, but that may have been for the notoriety and resultant publicity more than anything. Ironically, of course, this was originally a time of non-religious revelry celebrating the renewal of the world, and the bunnies and chicks of the PEEPS family are direct-line descendants from that.

PEEPS are small, sickly-sweet, shaped blobs of pink or yellow sugar-coated marshmallow. According to their official website, the number of them eaten at this time of year would more than circle the earth's circumference. They have been the best-selling non-chocolate Easter candy for more than a decade, and have spawned much research into how they might survive a variety of traumas.

It seems, however, that no one has thought to research the long-term effects on them of being subjected to the annual Saturday night TV airing of "Moses" at Easter weekend. There's no telling what the sight of Charlton Heston oiled up and in chains at the feet of Yul Brynner in a tin skirt might have upon those malleable young PEEPS. Have mercy on those young innocents next year please, dear ABC.

::The end of the world is nigh!::

This coming week is the 100th anniversary of the eggplant that ate Chicago and it's impossible to escape references to it. (Lucky you! You just did!) Graphic virtual tours on the TV news of where all the faults run in this area are whipping up a sense of unease to rival the Y2K damp squib. Speaking of damp, the incessant rain soaking hillsides and putting pressure on the faults is not helping either.

Let alone that big thud I felt last night, which was a 2.8 centred about a mile from where I live. Here in the East Bay, the Hayward fault runs beneath and through just about every arterial link that could be used for getting help in to people. It was the San Andreas fault on the west side of the Bay that caused both the 1906 and 1989 disasters. The Hayward, in contrast, is majorly overdue for a biggie.

Nonetheless, I am seriously disillusioned about the way in which the television news hasn't been capturing ALL the omens and disasters of late. Sure, they reported on the microwave sized blocks of ice that are falling from the sky here in Oakland and in Southern California. But where was the news coverage about this event back in February:

According to the Internet source, "Millions of eyewitnesses watched in stunned horror Tuesday as light emptied from the sky, plunging the U.S. and neighboring countries into darkness. As the hours progressed, conditions only worsened."

So, from the I Am the Truth and the Light (-en Up) Brigade, Happy Easter!



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