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Understanding And Escaping Those With NPD

The term “narcissist” is often casually used to describe anyone who seems vain or self-centered, but true narcissism runs much deeper and darker. At its worst, narcissism can manifest as Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), a diagnosable personality disorder. Those with NPD portray manipulative, dominating, and destructive qualities that can have a significant impact on those closest to the narcissist. It is not simply about being selfish. While only 1% of people have actually been diagnosed with NPD, experts estimate that it might be higher, with estimates as high as 15% to 20% of the population. This means that one in every two households has a narcissist in their midst.

Narcissists think their wants, needs, and opinions are more important than other people's. Relationships with them are challenging because of their arrogance, entitlement, and lack of empathy are all fueled by this belief. They may see others as instruments to further their own agendas and speak down to them. Most people can be selfish once in a while and then feel guilt afterwards, but narcissists act like this by default. Their relationships are often difficult to sustain because they aren’t able to have genuinely reciprocal relationships where both parties’ needs are valued equally.

There are several subtypes of narcissism, with each having unique traits of its own. Grandiose, or overt, narcissists are often charismatic and ambitious, so they are often objectively successful. Vulnerable narcissists believe they are perpetual victims, and often feel a sense of entitlement for all of the “injustices” they face. Communal narcissists do good deeds to feel a sense of praise from others for being a good person, rather than coming from a genuine effort to do good deeds. Malignant narcissists are especially damaging to relationships due to their manipulative and vengeful tendencies. Finally, dark empaths are those with strong narcissist qualities, but they have a higher degree of emotional intelligence and are able to blend into society more easily.

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It can be emotionally draining and terrible for one's mental health to live with a narcissist. Their lack of empathy frequently results in poor communication, overstepping of one’s boundaries, and secret keeping. They typically vie with family members for approval or attention, usually as a symptom of repressed feelings of shame or low self-worth. Narcissists frequently use gaslighting, victimization, the inflating of accomplishments, and love bombing to dominate and manipulate others.

All of these qualities can have serious consequences for family members, especially spouses and kids. Exposure to narcissistic behavior on a regular basis can lead to emotional trauma, substance abuse, trust issues, and intense feelings of guilt. Many eventually hit a breaking point when the only way to protect their mental or physical well-being is to separate themselves from the narcissist. But severing a relationship with a narcissist is rarely easy, particularly if you are emotionally or legally bound by marriage or children.

Careful preparation is necessary when leaving a narcissistic relationship. The first stage should involve methodical planning for life after separation and taking action to safeguard one's financial and legal interests. This can involve transferring money to a separate account, revising a will, removing oneself from shared bills, and creating new contact information. To avoid sabotage from the narcissist, this planning stage should ideally be carried out without alerting the narcissist.

It's crucial to be cautious throughout this process since narcissists frequently attempt to regain control when they feel like they're losing it. Strong support networks, such as family members or friends, can offer both protection and moral support. It is hard and challenging to escape a narcissist, but it is possible. People can take back their life and find peace away from the chaos caused by narcissists if they create a clear and structured plan.

How Narcissists Destroy Families

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