Top 10 things overheard when Goff met Arafat

1. "All this way and now I find out that James K Baxter lived in the other Jerusalem!"

2. "Apologies for dropping in - I would have used the door but there wasn't one."

3. "I know you're probably sick of hearing this, but, man, those Israelis really kicked your butt in '67."

4. "Radical elements? Hey, tell me about it. We've got something called the Maori caucus."

5. "By the way Mr Arafat, I love the quaint head gear. Very Versace meets Trade Aid."

6. "Mr Goff, thank you for such a thoughtful gift. I've always wanted a Phillishave."

7. "Well, it was great meeting you but I've gotta go. Can you call me a camel?"

8. "I've always wanted to ask you - what's with the holster and the tea towel?"

9. "Mr Arafat, would you be kind enough to sign my photo of Che Guevera?"

10. "Just before you go, Mr Goff. Do you mind taking this suitcase back to New Zealand with you? It's just, um, some presents for a niece."

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