Mel Gibson's Racist Slurs "All About Context"

Washington Crisis Management Consultants Accept Mel Gibson as Client
'Racist Slurs are All About Context'

Washington, DC – The Washington-based EisenstadtGroup today announced its intention to accept Oscar®-winning actor/director Mel Gibson as a client. "We understand that Mr. Gibson is going through a tumultuous personal time right now, but we also realize his enormous talent and potential as an artist and advocate for public and philanthropic causes," said Martin Eisenstadt, CEO and Founder of the EisenstadtGroup, a crisis management consulting firm.

"Regrettably much of Hollywood, including Mr. Gibson's former agency, has turned its back on him," said Eisenstadt. "But Mel still embodies the hopes and dreams of millions of Americans, and especially in this campaign season, we feel that he can give voice to the unheard mainstream."

"We've seen many situations like this, and we generally find that after a period of public silence, then penitence, there comes a moment of redemption, acceptance and ultimately a stronger level of public support," added Eisenstadt. "We pride ourselves in the field of 'contrition management' and we've already begun drafting the appropriate apologies."

"Even though we are aware of the n-word's adverse historical connotation, racist slurs are all about context," said Eisenstadt.  "Calling Barack Obama, Thurgood Marshall or your next door neighbor a 'n***r' would be inappropriate and legitimate grounds for public ostracization. But in the privacy of your own home, to drunkenly accuse your significant other of sexually provoking a 'pack of n****rs,' well, who hasn't done that? And according to that standard of judgment, we'd all be guilty."

The EisenstadtGroup has a 14-year track record as one of Washington's preeminent personal crisis management consultants, which has represented numerous public figures from the political, business and entertainment sectors, including Eliot Spitzer, Sen. Larry Craig, New York Mayor Rudolph Giuliani, and Gov. Sarah Palin. A critically-acclaimed author, Eisenstadt also serves as a Sr. Fellow at the Harding Institute for Freedom & Democracy, and has regularly appeared on MSNBC, CNN, the Los Angeles Times, NPR, USAToday and Time Magazine.  

[The above article was a work of satire. Any resemblance to persons, living, dead or borderline insane is purely coincidental.]

ENDS

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