Top Scoops

Book Reviews | Gordon Campbell | Scoop News | Wellington Scoop | Community Scoop | Search

 

Open Letter to John Key from Kiwi Mum & Dad Investors Inc.

OPEN LETTER

To: The Right Honourable John Key, Prime Minister and CEO of New Zealand
From: Kiwi Mum & Dad Investors Incorporated

Sir,

It has come to our attention that you are selling up to 49 percent of New Zealand’s core power infrastructure assets. Furthermore, you have repeatedly specified your preference for shares in these assets to be sold to “Kiwi mum and dad investors.” As our company name is Kiwi Mum & Dad Investors, Inc (and it’s not as though you can restrict who buys shares on the open market,) we believe that we are ideally placed to purchase these shares.

Our company is a wholly owned subsidiary of Multi National Group LLC, based in Brunei. We believe that, should you accept our offer, Kiwi Mum & Dad Investors Inc will be ideally placed to on-sell these shares to, well, anyone (or liquidate asset core infrastructure) for a quick buck. We wholeheartedly endorse your ideological drive to get government out the business of holding assets in trust for all New Zealanders, preferring to submit them to the blind vagaries of the market. We appreciate that you, as a former investment banker and currency trader, will understand the importance of buying low and then getting the hell out. That’s what we propose to do.

At this stage we are prepared to offer up to $100 for 49 percent of New Zealand’s energy infrastructure, but we are open to negotiation.

We anticipate your prompt reply.

Sincerely,

Kiwi Mum & Dad Investors Incorporated

This open letter was prepared by the Munistry of Social Development.

ENDS

© Scoop Media

 
 
 
Top Scoops Headlines

 

Gordon Campbell: On The Addiction To Chinese Student Fees

Last week, Australian PM Scott Morrison extended its ban on foreign visitors from or passing through from mainland China – including Chinese students - for a third week. New Zealand has dutifully followed suit, with our travel ban ... More>>

Gordon Campbell: On Coronavirus, And The Iowa Debacle

As Bloomberg says, the coronavirus shutdown is creating the world’s biggest work-from-home experiment. On the upside, the mortality rate with the current outbreak is lower than with SARS in 2003, but (for a number of reasons) the economic impact this time ... More>>

Gordon Campbell: On Dodging A Bullet Over The Transport Cost Over-Runs

As New Zealand gears up to begin its $6.8 billion programme of large scale roading projects all around the country, we should be aware of this morning’s sobering headlines from New South Wales, where the cost overruns on major transport projects ... More>>

Gordon Campbell:On Kobemania, Palestine And The Infrastructure Package

Quick quiz to end the week. What deserves the more attention – the death of a US basketball legend, or the end of Palestinian hopes for an independent state? Both died this week, but only one was met with almost total indifference by the global community. More>>

Gordon Campbell: On The Double Standard That’s Bound To Dominate The Election

Are National really better political managers than Labour, particularly when it comes to running the economy? For many voters – and the business community in particular - their belief in National’s inherent competence is a simple act of faith. More>>


Gordon Campbell : On Dealing With Impeccable, Impeachable Lies

By now, the end game the Republican Senate majority has in mind in their setting of the rules for the impeachment trial of Donald J. Trump is pretty clear to everyone: first deny the Democrats the ability to call witnesses and offer evidence, and then derisively dismiss the charges for lack of evidence. For his part, does former security adviser John Bolton really, really want to testify against his former boss? If there was any competing faction within the Republican Party, there might be some point for Bolton in doing so – but there isn’t. More>>

Gordon Campbell: On Why The Dice Are Loaded Against Women..

If they enter public life, women can expect a type of intense (and contradictory) scrutiny that is rarely applied to their male counterparts... More>>