"The Corrective Party today confirmed its suspicions about who or what is sponsoring the Christian Haemorrhoids when we noted that the party in question attacked Pizza Hut, a fast-food brand." Sister Vomitoria SM, diet nun, today revealed.

"Why should the Christian Haemorrhoids Poultry be interested in fast food unless it is covertly funded by fast food interests itself!!! Sure enough, after digging, we came up with Colonel Whiteperson's Half-Baked Southern Turkeys of Inbred, Arkansas, an obscure brand. However, photos of the brands in question disclose that several of the half-baked fowls bear an unpleasant resemblance to the Capon that rules the roost over there!!!"

"All this should teach us a lesson. Beware of half- baked old turkeys trying to get into Parliament, as they are likely to lack taste..." disclosed the Corrective Party shadow spokesnun on Culinary Affairs.

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