Greens Spokesman 'Relic From A Lost Era'
Libertarianz Deputy Leader Richard McGrath says he would sleep more soundly at night if the Greens Agriculture Spokesman, and most of his tree-hugging colleagues, got back in their Tardis and travelled back to the Stone Age and their waiting families.
"Why anyone would want to return to an agrarian lifestyle of unrelenting dawn-to-dusk drudgery is beyond me," McGrath said after reading the latest Greens press release, which he described as a blatant attempt to divert taxpayer money to their friends in the "organics" industry.
"Organic agriculture is wasteful and inefficient," McGrath added. "It ties up vast tracts of land in producing inferior bacteria-laden vegetation that is barely fit for human consumption."
McGrath rubbished Greens claims that the demand for "GE-free" food is impossible to meet. "The open market is perfectly capable of providing 'genetically correct' food to the chardonnay socialists and Luddites from the ruling class, but this market is a somewhat limited. The rest of us prefer more nutritious, attractive and durable food items."
"According to Helen Clark, New Zealanders need to develop a niche market if we are to thrive in the global economy," said McGrath. "Libertarianz suggest that instead of promoting a backward-looking genetically-correct commune of bearded sandal-wearing hippies, a no-tax zone would be a better idea. This would encourage the victims of other revenue-grabbing governments to set up their headquarters here, employ New Zealanders, and amass a disproportionate amount of wealth onshore."
"This won't happen," sighed McGrath, "because Mr Anderton and his killjoys just can't stand the thought of New Zealanders getting rich."